Small Talk

4 Ways To Avoid Looking Stupid When Making Small Talk

4 Ways To Avoid Looking Stupid When Making Small Talk

The fear of saying something silly and feeling embarrassed stops many of us from contributing more to discussions at work and when we are relaxing with friends. And ironically the more we worry about it, the more tense we get and the more likely we are to say something stupid. Let us a take a look at some remedies:

1. Learn to relax when you feel under pressure

I often talk about the importance of managing your emotions This is an essential skill. There are a wide range of courses and books that you can refer to if you want to learn more about relaxation. When you feel relaxed it is easier to think on your feet and to be flexible when you need to be.

2. Prepare Yourself

Before a social gathering get ready to have something to talk about. With the internet on your PC there is no excuse for not becoming well informed about the world. The more knowledge you have the more conversations you can contribute to. Make a point though of reading up on a variety of subjects otherwise your conversation topics will be limited to what interests you the most. And those topics may not interest your friends as much.

3. Become genuinely interested in other people

One of the big secrets to conversation power is to shut up! We are all a lot more interested in ourselves than in anyone else. When there is a long silence encourage the other person to talk by asking questions and taking an active interest in the answers. Take charge of the situation if you want the conversation to continue.

4. Stupid Statements Are Allowed!

If you say something stupid it is not the end of the world. If you try to hide your error then the situation can become chaotic very quickly. It is far better to just admit that you made a mistake. Also, accept that even smart people say stupid things some times. As long as you accept that you will make mistakes you have nothing to worry about. Expecting yourself to be perfect is unfair and just sets you up for failure. All you need to do now is to decide how you will deal with these mistakes when they do happen.

5. Enjoy The Silence!

When there is a long silence in a conversation what normally passes through your mind? Do you judge it as bad? Do you feel under pressure to speak? The other person has created the silence with you. Why not wait for him to speak first? Take the responsibility off your shoulders. It takes at least two people to have a conversation. Finally, the reason silence can be uncomfortable is because you become self conscious. You become very aware of your own thoughts and feelings

There is one great way to deal with this. Put your attention on something outside of yourself by paying great attention to the other person and whatever is going on around you in the room. Become fascinated by what you see and hear and you will forget about your own concerns.

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available for a limited time only at: www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com/report.htm. peter1510@hotmail.com

 

 

FAQ 

What are examples of small talk?

Small Talk: Conversation Starters

Beautiful day, isn’t it?

Can you believe all of this rain we’ve been having?

It looks like it’s going to snow.

It sure would be nice to be in Hawaii right about now.

I hear they’re calling for thunderstorms all weekend.

We couldn’t ask for a nicer day, could we?

How about this weather?

What is a small talk in English?

Small talk is a casual form of conversation that “breaks the ice” or fills an awkward silence between people. … Even though you may feel shy using your second language, it is sometimes considered rude to say nothing.

Is small talk rude?

Small talk is has always been part of modern existence. Part of it is trying to be polite, part of it is not knowing what to say, and part of it is literally to fill otherwise awkward silences. It’s also an inoffensive way to not seem ill-mannered when in the presence of somebody you don’t know well.

Why do I hate small talk?

The most common reasons that introverts hate small talk are: Boring and no point: Introverts prefer deeper conversation, normally with a few select friends. Discussion about random irrelevant rubbish serves no point and is boring. It’s fake: Small talk, to some, is fake.

What is the purpose of small talk?

Purpose. In spite of seeming to have little useful purpose, small talk is a bonding ritual and a strategy for managing interpersonal distance. It serves many functions in helping to define the relationships between friends, colleagues, and new acquaintances.

What do you do in small talk?

Here are 8 ways to make your conversations more meaningful:

* Ask Why and How Questions.

* Channel Curious George.

* Ask for advice.

* Avoid your favorite topic.

* Talk less and listen more.

* Obey the 20 second rule.

* Your body says it all.

* Lose the phone.

What’s another word for small talk?

In this page you can discover 37 synonyms, antonyms, idiomatic expressions, and related words for small talk, like: idle conversation, pleasantry, conversation, polite remark, prate, prattle, chatter, chit-chat, light conversation, jabber and words.

Why does small talk give me anxiety?

Some of the reasons include: an individual not being sure if they want to spend the time it takes to have a longer conversation, anxiety of running out of things to say, anxiety of connection, vulnerability, getting stuck in the conversation and not knowing how to eventually end it, or fear of offending the other by.

How do you hate small talk?

Here are eight tips to master the art of small talk.

* Reduce anxiety. Introverts may approach small talk with anxiety, ranging from slight apprehension to debilitating dread.

* Be purposeful.

* Channel your curiosity.

* Ask questions.

* Add juicy tidbits.

* Deepen the conversation.

* Recognize cues.

* Be kind to yourself.

What’s the opposite of small talk?

Big talk usually means boasting or bragging, but Kalina uses it in contrast to small talkSmall Talk – polite conversation about unimportant or uncontroversial matters?

How do you text small talk?

* How to start a conversation over text

* Send an honest compliment.

* Make a reference to something that they mentioned.

* Let them know that you are thinking about them.

* The cliffhanger text.

* Send a GIF, meme or emoji.

* The teasing text.

* The light and casual text.